Just So You Know: November 2005

30 November 2005

Just a word of warning

Do not run on a treadmill with bare feet.

28 November 2005

Back and gone again...

I had a great week in Disneyland. We didn’t leave the resort property for 5 days. Our flight landed at 12:10am so that we didn’t get home until 2am and the kids weren’t asleep until 3am. So this morning I figure that I’m going to sleep in and let the elementary age one sleep in since his teacher said that he’s out of control and on 2.5 hours of sleep he’ll be even more out of control. (Of course, if he was really ADD the way they say, he would be a calm cookie since being tired is a way of self-medicating).
Anyway, at about 8 am my boss calls. I start the conversation with the comment, “it’s my day off.” He follows that with, “I need you to go to Arizona tomorrow.” So I won’t even be home for 48 hours. At least I got 2 nights in my own bed. I’ll try and write more when I get home. I should at least give you a glowing report on what an improvement Disneyland was this time over four years ago. It’s wonderful what the new regional manager has done in such a short time.

21 November 2005

Just got back from parent teacher conference

DS#2 is in 4th grade. In 1st grade I realized he had a learning problem. The school refused to test him (He's doing fine in class except for his behavior). I paid to have private testing. The diagnosis came back positive for 3 issues. He's dyslexic (no surprise, so is his dad), Cognitive Auditory Processing Disorder (CAPD), and Impaired/Lacking Executive ability. In plain English, I have a troubled reader who has difficulty understanding verbal instructions and can't prioritize his homework or school assignments.

Once I had the private testing done, the school was willing to run some tests of their own. They basically agreed that he had a CAPD problem but the resource teacher told us that dyslexia is a made up condition that doesn't exist. They also said that they really felt he was ADHD and wouldn't take him into resource until we medicated him. (It's not yet illegal in my state to suggest that). Since the resource department refused to help us, the principal called me and suggest that we write up a 504 accommodation separate from the Resource people and she would file it. It turns out that she has a dyslexic son and remembers. meBarbie gave me some great things on CAPD that I took up to the school.

Fast forward 3 years of fighting with the teachers and the resource faculty. This year we have a new principal and a new resource teacher and my son only reads on a 1st grade level. The school psychologist doesn't think he has any psychological issues beyond the coping mechanisms he's developed to hide his learning disability. I've now hired a private tutor who wanted to come to the school and do one of his sessions during the time that he was in school. We tried it once. The principal and new resource teacher had an absolute hissy fit. We started going over files. All the stuff Barb gave me, all the copies of the independent testing, the 504 that we wrote up with the former principal - - NONE OF IT IS IN THE FILES. The only thing in the file is the testing the school did that showed he was on grade level and the 504 that we refused because I was not going to medicate him for a condition he doesn't have.

So the principal and the resource teacher are jumping all over me for not having him tested when he first started falling behind. I just sat there dumbfounded. For FOUR YEARS I have been begging for help. Now they're saying that I'm the problem because the previous resource teacher is claiming that we refused to allow her to work with him. EXCUSE ME???

So, tonight as parent teacher conferences I signed all the paperwork for them to retest him. I took in new copies of the resources that Barb gave me and next week, I'll take in copies of the private testing that was done (I have to find it). DH is convinced that they're just trying to placate me since they now know that I'm paying for private tutoring. I'm worried that they will confuse him since I'm not going to stop the tutoring. The tutor said that she would be happy to co-ordinate working with the resource teacher but I don't think the school will be happy about working with her. DH thinks it's all just blowing smoke and they won't do anything but warehouse him since that's what happened to him when he was in resource. DH also thinks that they're going to tell us that it's all a behavior problem again. I have a defense for that though. I have a letter from the school psychologist from last year telling me that she felt DS#2 is an incredibly wise kid who knows how to manipulate people in order to get out of things that he doesn't want to do. She asked if we had considered testing him for learning disabilities. (Maybe that should have clued me in that things were missing from his file?)

In the meantime, I'm going to have to start taking him out on the last 1/2 hour of school on Thursday for the reading tutoring. It's the only time slot that she has available during the week this year. If she has a student drop then she will consider a 4:00 pm slot for him.

In addition, we got the CRT testing from last year back. He's above the state, school, and class averages for mathematics and way below all the statistics for reading. This district has a track record for finding ways to keep resource or 504 kids out of advanced classes. DH is convinced that by getting him reading help, we'll lock him out of advanced math classes.

I'm just so confused anymore about knowing what's best for him.

Sorry for the rant.

19 November 2005

Update on the weight thing...

I went to the pharmacy and picked up the new prescription. Seems the doctor didn't believe me when I said I was bloated when he weighed me. He's given me a stronger dosage of the Phentermine. This could be fun! and in the meantime, I'm down 11 pounds from where I started with 20 more to go.

18 November 2005

A week in review

Sunday was incredible. I woke up depressed about going to church because I just so don’t fit in. DH told me that I needed to do more to invite people over and get to know them. So I get to church (late) and the Sunday school lesson is about missionary work and the subject came around to supporting each other in the congregation and supporting our families emotionally. It was just what I needed. Then Relief Society was about living by faith and following the Holy Ghost. I had an epiphany about visiting teaching. It hit me that the women I’m assigned to visit teach are the women that I would love to just hang out with if there wasn’t anything church related involved. So I decided to throw the standard visit part out the window and just call and do stuff with them. I ended up at one house Sunday night and we just talked until 1 am. I’m going to see her daughter’s dance recital on Saturday.

Monday work went pretty smooth I got a lot done but was missing accounting data on stuff and the accounting chick snapped at me anytime I brought in things that didn’t balance (probably because I insisted that my numbers were correct). Monday night was the family reunion and they had a historian there to talk about Grandpapa’s wives (you all knew I was from polygamous stock, right?). He talked a bit about the first wife that no one talks about because she had no children, was mentally ill, and they did divorce. The speaker spent just a few minutes on the other 5 and showing statistics on how they compared in age, death dates, and number of children. He also went over when the kids were born. There was one year that had 3 kids born. I learned so much and I had taken DS#1 with me. He usually finds the reunion boring until the food and mingling part at the end. This time, he put up his book and listened.

Tuesday - I got to work and was informed that I would be staying late with the out of town computer specialist and making sure that everything got set up. I left the office at 4:30 am but I did get the Jr. High newsletter written, laid out, approved and copied before I left the office. I also realized that the company American Express card is missing.

Wednesday – I got up at 7am to see if I really had to go back to work. I did for some reports. The accounting chick just about took my head off when I told her I didn’t have the data. She finally realized that she had pulled up the correct report and then sent me the one for a different client. I had arranged to take Wed afternoon off earlier but now, it’s not flex time its comp time so I still have to find a day to take off between now and Dec 31 so I only have 80 hours of unused vacation to carry over. At 1:00 I went up to the school to meet with DS#2 and his tutor. I should have checked that the teacher was ready. Apparently despite emails with the teacher, the principal didn’t know anything about it. A room had never been reserved. They gave us one room then shuffled us as another teacher needed it. I also wanted copies of his file since I had things from Barb in there about how CAPD and ADD mimic each other but need to be treated differently. None of it could be found. After that I went to the Deseret Foundation quilt show, 74 Hand-quilted Quilts some of them even hand pieced. All of the auction proceeds will go to the IHC Hospital chains to cover care of indigent patients. After that I had people over to my house to work on the Harry Potter #3 quilt. They’re coming back Sunday to help with it too.

Thursday – Accounting woman bit my head off when I walked in the door. Seems she thought that I read minds about what terminated groups she wanted numbers on. But then she’s been biting my head off since Monday and I’m just biting back (which isn’t nice). But then she’s also been blaming me for some of her own mistakes. Other than that work went pretty smooth and I got some stitching time on Gandalf this evening while watching my Netflix movies. I also realized that Harry Potter comes out Friday.

Friday – Morning came too soon. I did drop off 2 of the Netflix movies for return. And I did find the missing American Express card. It was borrowed by the Christmas party committee and they were sure they had returned it but when I made them search their desks and purses (mean, mean, nasty looks) one of the girls found it in her purse. Funny how that happens. I still don’t have tickets for Harry Potter. At least I don’t have to come in to work next week.

13 November 2005

Shopping (yes, I hate it but I have to do it sometimes)

So for the first time in, like forever, I went clothing shopping for myself. Now I have bought sweaters and t-shirts over the last 5 years but no skirts or pants. Seriously, except for t-shirts and light sweaters, I didn’t have anything in my closet that was made after 2000. Well, even if my doctor thinks I haven’t been losing weight, my clothes have been getting looser. I figured that I needed to get something that fit.
So, I called my new personal shopper. It wasn’t really easy since she lives across the country and doesn’t know my current hair color (which will change again on Thursday) and hasn’t seen me recently. She referred me to some things online and a few of them were at Talbots. I took my measurements and ordered online based on what the tape measure said. Well, suffice it to say, I’m not a Petite 12. The skirt was huge. However, based on what I returned, a smart sales clerk (I’ll call her Shirley) pulled several black skirts for me in a size 10. Well, I went in today to try them on and a 10 is TOO BIG!! I was so excited.
However, I should add that I was worried when I first walked into the store. I haven’t seen that much lime green and pink together since 1982. I really began to wonder when I noticed a lot of the material was ultra suede and corduroy. Umm, flashbacks anyone?
Anyway, I asked for the items on hold for me and when they didn’t fit, I asked Shirley if they had anything in a smaller size. She couldn’t find an 8P for me in the skirt that I like (even in Petite the length on the long skirt was too long). She found a misses 6 that worked (the misses short length in mid-calf on me). Then I realized that any blouses I had to go with this skirt were long gone (sacrificed to ketchup, sweet and sour, and any other sauce that attacked the food storage shelf between my shoulders). So I looked at blouses. I usually hate button down blouses but Shirley found 2 that I loved and I found one on my own. Now the scary part, I’m a 12 or 14 in blouses, depending on whether it’s Misses or Petite. While waiting for Shirley to bring me a large in the cardigan sweater that I found to go over the hot pink tank sweater, I found a pair of low rise pants that actually looked decent on me, except they were about 2.5 inches too long.
I really hate low rise pants. They’re one of the reasons that I haven’t shopped for clothes in ages and why my daughter buys her jeans in the men’s section (not to mention the lower prices). Anyway, these animal print cords came up high enough to cover my leftover baby pouch (yes, I know the baby is 9 but I still have the leftover pouch.) Anyway, Shirley found me a skirt in the same material and pattern and located the pants in a petite size that fits me at catalog sales. So, I ended up spending way more that I should have and I have several outfits to wear to work. Except, I’m not wearing them in public until my personal shopper approves them, I had DH take pictures and email them to her for approval. Who knows, I may be returning the whole lot on Monday. Too bad peasant skirts and large gypsy blouses aren’t appropriate for the office anymore. Those I can pick out with confidence.

12 November 2005

A thought about Veteran's Day (Armistice Day)

Yesterday was Veteran’s day. Last night as I thought about the veteran’s in my life it hit me that the men came to mind first but I know several women veteran’s too; mothers that left children behind, or put off having children, to serve their country. I remember reading a book about post traumatic stress disorder following Vietnam. It said the group getting the least treatment and probably needing it most was the nurses from the aide stations. In high school my best friend wanted to be in the Air Force, until she found out that women weren’t allowed to fly fighter jets. At that time, women were relegated to transports, refueling planes and ground support. She decided that if she could fly fighters she wouldn’t join. My daughter is getting recruiting notices now it’s amazing what military jobs are open to women now that weren’t open when I graduated. Natalie may not have been able to fly fighters but her daughter can should she choose too. Other options that weren’t available were on ship in the Navy. I’m still not sure that I fully agree with co-educational military units. I can see both points of the arguments for and against. I just dislike the thought of women going in as ground forces. I don’t have any illusions about women not being able to handle being grunts. I do have illusions about the male grunts not being able to handle having women in the trenches. I have this grand illusion of chivalry not being dead.
Anyway, back to the original thought. Thank all the military personnel in your life, male and female, not just on Veteran’s day (or Armistice Day if you prefer) but every day.

10 November 2005

Guaranteed way for gas prices to drop?

I was so excited yesterday when I got to fill my tank at $2.32 per gallon. I hadn't seen anything for under $2.50 in weeks. So this morning when I drive by the station, it's at $2.29. Hopefully it will drop again by the time I need to fill up next week.

08 November 2005

Election report

So this year we had 142 people come to the polls and 3 absentee ballots. We had 404 people listed on the rolls but 28 people definitely didn't live in the area. So 145 out of 376 is 39% which is a better turnout than we had for the presidential election last year.
So, the zoning of a gravel pit is more important than the man we put in as governor or president.

07 November 2005

Caught in the act...

So this morning I catch my youngest son wetting his hair with the cap of his drinking water bottle. Apparently, this has been his way of “taking a shower” in the mornings. I’ve been suspecting something was funny since I never heard the water running or felt the water pressure change while I was showering. It just makes me wonder what he’s been doing to fake brushing his teeth but still have minty breath.

05 November 2005

Guess what I did today?

I put on a pair of size 8 jeans without having to lay down on the bed to zip them and they actually have room in them for me to sit down and I can put my cell phone in the pocket without feeling like I won't be able to get it out without taking the jeans off. Only 19 pounds to go....

04 November 2005

Just ignore the following whine...

My sister had a baby boy today. I’m so grateful that with her first she allowed my mother into the surgical suite for the Cesarean. When my oldest was born, my mother refused to come help me because “you aren’t a real mother if you didn’t have your children vaginally.” So I had an 8 pound 14 oz baby that I couldn’t lift because she was beyond my weight limit. Thank goodness for a great husband. My apartment got really messy since I couldn’t vacuum for 8 weeks and my husband was so tired after work and school that it didn’t get done. Of course with selective memory, my mom claims that my husband wouldn’t let her come clean. That didn’t happen until the 3rd when my husband knew I would be emotionally overwrought after having to deal with her snide remarks and refusal to do things my way. My sisters say that I need to just forget the rudeness and the hurt because after all, that’s just mom. She doesn’t mean to hurt people but she does. Dad blames it on cultural differences. My husband is convinced she does it on purpose. Her brother says she’s just socially naive. She tells me not to believe anything her brother says because she believes he takes advantage of people.
She does wonderful things too, the favorite family story is the week she picked up a hitchhiker and took him to Disneyland. My sisters say that I need to give up my hurt and just be nicer to mom. But it’s not that easy when she rubs my nose in things like marrying a man that she didn’t like (but who I still adore 19 years later), denies that she ever did anything that hurt me (both emotionally and physically), and accuses me of not doing enough to help my son with learning challenges (He would be fine if I let him move in with her, you know).
My friends tell me to just ignore her and live my life. As Dr. Laura says, there are two chances to have a mother/daughter relationship. If it was miserable when you were a daughter, you have a 2nd chance when you are the mother. I just hope my daughter doesn’t consider me the PITA that I consider my mother. Of course, I do expect to vacuum my daughter’s house when she has her kids, if she wants me there.

03 November 2005

Don't you love it when a plan comes together....

But don’t you hate feeling guilty sharing it? Many of my friends have some real heavy issues that they’re dealing with, death, divorce, infidelity, illness, and real lifestyle upheaval issues. Last week I met with a financial advisor to help me plan how to put 3 of us in college together. He mentioned that he could also help me get to where I could have the same or a better income working from home. He would give me a discount if I decided by Monday. By Monday, I still didn’t have references. When I did get the references, they set off alarm bells. So the question for prayer became, “So how do I get everything paid for and still transition to working from home?”
Be careful what you pray for, you just might get it. I have 2 offers for working from home jobs. I have my current employer calling to see how we can do a raise but still keep it pre-tax (I have no problem dumping all of a raise into my 401K), we discovered that my daughter is qualified for a full ride at the school of her choice. And then today, I got an offer from an author I enjoy for a copy of his how to get your book published, sold and get on the speaking circuit.
I may feel differently next week but right now, I’m pinching myself to see if this is all really true.

01 November 2005

From a dear friend

On my way in to work this morning, when I was stopped at a light, I looked in my rear view mirror. There was an elderly lady in a big old rusted out car and she had something round and silver up to the side of her head, holding it with her right hand and holding the steering wheel with her left. I couldn't figure out what that round silver thing was and kept looking.

It took me a minute to realize that it was the bottom of a can of soda and she was talking into it, as if it were a cell phone. Then she started shaking it around and looking at it like she couldn't figure out why it wasn't working. When she moved it, I could see that it was indeed a can of soda, 7-up to be exact.

At least I still know the difference between my cell phone and a can of coke.

Just So You Know